On the way to school each morning my son and I hold hands and pray about the day ahead. Please don’t misunderstand. We are not “those” Christians…the ones we all would like to be whose every conversation revolves around Christ and His work in our lives. No. We are not the super-spiritual. We are the super-desperate-to-get-one-thing-right. So, we pray in the few silent moments we have before reaching the carpool line and the gun goes off to start the race.
Anyway…today I noticed that I was holding his hand, but he wasn’t holding mine. I asked him what was up, and he insisted that yes, he was holding my hand too. Funny our difference of perspective: I really had a grip on him, but he was just kind of resting. It made me flash back to when he was a toddler. Rather than just rest in my grip then, he would actively try to yank free, fascinated by everything he saw.
I used to loop my little finger over the back of his hand just to get a bit of added assurance for when he wanted adventure that led him straight into danger. I told my son this morning, “This is what we do to God all day long. We let go, then grab hold. Let go, grab hold. Let go, grab hold”, and we made a silly game of it until I really did have to let go to turn on the heater. But the thing about God is that He never lets go. He never has to. Not even to adjust the heat.
Okay, so this could go several directions. Like, thank goodness we can rest and the Lord never lets go. Or, too bad we do so much resting and not enough hanging on. And, how sad that we so often want to twist ourselves out of His grip to go off on our own and straight into the lion’s mouth. I guess the bottom line is the same in every scenario. God. Never. Lets. Go. Never. Ever. Ever.
I don’t know what that does for you today, but for me it is nothing short of miraculous grace. I am that toddler most days desperate for my own way, charting the path of my own destruction, heedless to the dangers around me. Careless with my own well-being. Self-determined. Self-willed. Self-destructive. And yet, my God never lets go.
I am desperate for that truth today. I am determined to hang on, but when I notice that I have been resting, I will hasten to tighten my hold. I will choose to be restrained by His grip, trusting that it is only this which prevents my total self-destruction. Gracious Father! Get a good grip and hang on tight!